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2.4sMan, I sure miss my sweetheart back home.
2.37sI can't wait to get back to that person.
1.17sChow time, boys.
2sYes, sir, Sergeant Major General Captain!
1.8sAh, come on, boys, it's Thanksgiving.
2.72sCall me Major General Captain. Now you eat up.
1.94s
2.69sI don't trust that turkey those Iraqis made.
2.54sAh, you're all wet, Swanson. I call the white meat.
1.23sI call the dark meat.
1.6sI call the cell phone duct taped to the side!
1.4sNo!
3.17s
2.12sThey're all dead, sir, except for Swanson.
2.1sHe's in a coma, but he's unlikely to recover.
3.1sOkay, well, just send Swanson's parents a letter saying that he's dead,
1.67s'cause those are already printed.
2.07sYou know what? Send one to my parents, too.
2.9sI spent five years in a Kuwait military hospital.
3.1sI woke up from the coma last week and I flew straight here.
1.82sKind of a Thanksgiving surprise.
2.92sHey, when you get sexually abused while you're in a coma,
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