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1.28sPeter, where have you been?
1.94sLook, you try scheduling a haircut today.
3.3sYou know, you'd think you'd wanna spend your last day on Earth with your family!
0.85sHey, I'm here, aren't I?
1.9sWith only seconds left.
1.27sDon't you love me?
1.18sOf course I love you, Lois!
2.33sYou're the most important person in the world to me!
1.39sYou promise?
0.77sI promise.
0.63s
1.27s
2.72sTen, nine, eight...
1.38sI just hate being around the kids.
0.95sWhat?
1.58s...six, five...
2.05sSorry, I just thought I'd be honest, since we're gonna die.
2.95s...three, two, one.
1.8sBOTH: April fools!
1.03sWhat?
1.23sYou gotta be kidding me!
1.17sWe're not gonna die?
2sNo, we're not gonna die!
1.57s(ALL CHEERING)
2.24s
1.8sWait, what did Dad just say?
2.83s
2s
6.59sYes, April Fools! We at Channel Five News concocted the whole black hole story as part of our commitment to being festive around the holidays.
5.97sAnd with only 87 suicides and widespread looting, we think this was a pretty successful practical joke.