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1.2sI must.
3.47sThis is the first time you've opened your mouth and I haven't wanted to shit in it.
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3.79sANNOUNCER ON TV: This portion of the Channel Five News at 6:00 is brought to you by Condoms.
3.95sPut us on backwards a little bit, then put us on the right way.
2.59sMom, Dad, I need to get new sneakers.
2.1sWhat? I just bought you new sneakers.
2.03sI know, but I need cooler ones.
1.02sShut up and stop complaining.
1.88sWhen I was your age, I didn't even have sneakers.
1.75sWe wore stale hamburger buns.
1.35sNo, you didn't, Peter.
2.08sShh! He doesn't know that. He's just a dumb, fat loser.
1.43sDid you see his shoes?
2.23sLook, Chris, I'm sorry, but money's tight right now.
3.77sYeah, I even had to take a second job as a door-to-door vacuum salesman.
2.14sThis thing can pick up anything. Here's a little demonstration.
1.9sI'll pour some wine, rub in some feces,
2.28sand to top it off, some mustard mixed with feces.
1.25sTough stain, right?
1.62sOh, crap, I forgot the vacuum.