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2.7sYour play panders to the lowest common denominator, Brian.
1.47sAnd it doesn't even do that well.
1.32sShut up!
8.29sMay every person that laughs at your sophomoric effort be a reminder of your eternal mediocrity and pierce your heart like a knife.
0.5s
1.42s
2.25s
0.98s(PANTING)
1.29s
1.55s(CHATTERING)
0.75s
1.3sCome here, you bastard!
2.62s(BARKING)
2.69sYou stink! And your play stinks!
1.4sThis ain't about me, is it?
0.84s
0.7s
4.87s(SOBBING) (INHALES SHARPLY) (SNIFFLING) No.
1.43sAnd I'm sorry,
1.1s
1.87sbut nobody can ever know that.
1.2s(CRACKS)
1.45s
2.78s
1.89sDonna? It's Grant, your new husband!
1.1sHi, honey.
1.13sI've got great news.