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5.64sand it's just waiting to transform your uncut, trash-strewn lawn into a living canvas that tells passersby,
2.77s"Hey, everyone, a real funny bugger lives here."
6.84sYour neighbors will chuckle warmly, and motorists will slow down and applaud when they cast their eyes on such favorites as Sort-of Ben and Jerry's-Looking Cow,
1.94sBlack Silhouetted Cowboy Leaning on Barn,
1.43sand everybody's favorite,
3.4sFat Woman Bending Over Tending to Her Garden in Big, Polka-Dotted Bloomers.
2.64sMost of this stuff is priced to move, and until it does,
1.43sit's an enormous fire hazard,
2.3sso please come see me, on Route 2 in Weekapaug.
2.34sLook for the Sort-of Ben and Jerry's Cow out front!
3.67sWe interrupt this program to bring you grim news out of LaGuardia Airport,
3.07swhere a 767 has been forced to make a crash landing.
2sOh, man, I tell you, now that I'm a parent, I can't even watch stories like that.
1.51s
1.8sI just think, you know, I just think,
2.37s"Oh, my God, what if Dylan were on that plane?"
1.9sOh, my God, I just don't know what I would do.
1.1sI don't know what I would do.
1.93sYeah, yeah, I understand. That'd be tough.
2.64sOh, no. Oh, no. No, no. No, no, no. Quagmire, no.
3.77sYou do not understand. Until you have a child...