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1.53s(CHUCKLES) You said it, friend.
3.04sBut I wanted to stay, 'cause I almost had sex on this girl.
4.6sOh, yeah! But it was so expensive. Each drink was, like, six dollars forty.
0.74s
2.67s
4.5sAnd if I've done this right, then this is your card, Stewie.
1.54sReally, Brian? Card tricks?
1.94sThat's what's gonna close the deal with this woman?
1.13sWell, yeah. Why not?
1.9sYou need more than that. You need an act.
2.8sListen, I'll be your assistant, and we'll put on a whole big show.
1.83sReally? Yeah, we'll do all the great tricks.
1.2sYou can even split me in half.
1.43sWhat? Saw me in half.
1.8sWell, I am still a little shaky on some of this stuff.
1.3sI guess I could use the help.
2.83sGreat. And we'll get you a wand, a top hat and a cape.
3.24sIn fact, you can use Peter's cape from last year's Halloween costume.
3.74sHi, Brian. I'm Count Crotchula, the bulging vampire.
3.64sI'll bite your neck, but also look how big I am down there.
1.33sThat costume doesn't make any sense.
2.07sDon't stifle my creativity!
3.87sSee that bulge down there, Brian? What is that? What is it?
3.24sCan't be my pointy teeth, 'cause those are all the way up here.