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1.78sAs a professor of science,
3.92sI assure you that we did, in fact, evolve from filthy monkey-men!
1.9sI cannot speak for you, sir,
2.15sbut my ancestors were not monkeys.
1.4sThey were orangutans.
2.69sHard-working, patriotic orangutans.
1.47sDr. Banjo?
1.38sIn the fur.
2.34sAnd I remind you that evolution is merely a theory,
1.9slike gravity, or the shape of the Earth.
0.7s
1.84s
2.94sHey, Professor, I'm a flying spaghetti monster.
4.57sYou seriously believe I'm descended from some kind of flightless manicotti?
1.97sYes! Oh, please.
4.6sA far more logical explanation is the undisprovable science of Creatureism.
3.82sAll life was created in its present form 7,000 years ago
2.65sby a fantastical creature from outer space!
1.18sBunk! Oh!
1.2s
3.14sIf your elitist East Coast evolution is real,
4swhy has no one found the missing link between modern humans and ancient apes?
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