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2.37s'Cause comedy ain't funny anymore.
4sInstead of time-tested jokes about women drivers and doctor bills,
2.27syou got some big-chin schlub...
3.1sreading typos from the Palookaville Post.
3.57sWell, here's a headline for you: Nobody cares.
2.4s
2.5sHey, I washed your hair.
1.77sThese comics today.
2.37s"Ooh, look at me. I can't set my V.C.R.
2.24s"I can't open a bag of airline peanuts.
1.95sI'm a freakin' moron."
2.12s
2.69sKrusty's gone nuts.
3.24sThen you got these lady comics talking about stuff...
2.23sthat would embarrass Redd Foxx--
2.03sGod rest his smutty soul.
3.07sWho they slept with. What time they sit on the can.
2.67sThis is supposed to get you a husband?
0.73s
2.99sWhat the hell are you laughin' at? I'm just tellin' the truth.
0.48sAnd it's funny.
2.87sIt is?
3.9sIn that case, I'm proud to announce my triumphant return to comedy.