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1.97sWhy not? I got to get that woman out of my life.
2.37sI had to pour half a box of Carpet Fresh on her crotch,
1.5sjust to stay asleep last night.
1.3sYeah, but listen, Quagmire.
5.41sQuahog has some extremely draconian laws governing divorce that all heavily favor the woman.
1.64sWhat? What do you mean? Well, to be honest,
3.52sif you divorce her, she'll probably get everything you have.
3.54sWhat? No, that's impossible! I can't lose all my money and my house!
3.29sThen I'll have to move into some depressing divorced-guy apartment!
2.72sAs you can see, we have plenty of cabinet space for your plate.
1.57sThe oven, of course, is just decorative.
2.4sSeems okay. Do you have any other units available?
1.33sThis is our only one.
1.74sI hope you're happy, Marsha!
2.95s(THUDS) We might have something upstairs.
3.62sSorry, Quagmire, but the only way around the law is if the woman consents to a divorce.
1.07sConsent?
1.74sBut Charmese will never agree to that.
2.27sYou heard her, the crazy skank wants to be a wife.
2.07sShe's found herself a husband and she's not letting go.
3.47sI bet she's what happens if you put a Hooters girl in the microwave on "high."
2.84sWell, the only other choice is to let her take all your money.