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3.15sI had a feeling it was too good to be true.
3.37sEvery time you get a million dollars, something queers the deal.
3.07sI don't think real checks have exclamation points.
2.37sWell, at least we got a free sample of Reading Digest.
4.05sMarge, I never read a magazine in my life, and I'm not gonna start now.
2sHey, a cartoon!
3.24s
2.1sAin't it the truth?
1.52sNo, it's not the truth, Homer.
2.92sIt's well-documented that women are safer drivers than men.
3.17sOh, Marge, cartoons don't have any deep meaning.
2.57sThey're just stupid drawings that give you a cheap laugh.
2.02s
1.93sHey, Einstein, put down your reading.
1.53s- It's lunchtime.
- You go ahead.
2.57sHey, you don't wanna eat? What you do, get one of them stomach staples?
2.59sAs Tolstoy said in Quotable Notables,
3.55s"Give me learning, sir, and you may keep your black bread."
2.47sWho is that bookworm, Smithers? Homer Simpson, sir.
2.7sSimpson, eh? How very strange.
3.3sHis job description clearly specifies an illiterate.