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2.12sGood morning, fellow freedom-likers.
2.89sBirch Barlow, the fourth branch of government, the 51st state.
3.89sYou know, th-th-there are three things we're never gonna get rid of here in Springfield--
2.13sOne, the bats in the public library.
1.13s
2.6sTwo, Mrs. McFearly's compost heap.
0.65s
3.2s
3.09sAnd three, our six-term mayor,
3.77sthe illiterate, tax-cheating, wife-swapping, pot-smoking spend-o-Crat,
4.4sDiamond joe Quimby. Hey, I am no longer illiterate!
5.27sNow, why are we doomed to this Quimby quagmire, you ask, O Reasonable Listener?
2.28sBecause this town is under the stranglehold of...
4.82sa few tie-dyed tree huggers who would rather play hacky sack than lock up the homeless.
3.97sThis sounds awfully controversial.
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