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1.3sYeah, Summer, it's a big universe.
1.87sGet used to it. R-Right, Rick?
1.16sWell, what are we going to do?!
1.93sWe're gonna live our lives until we die.
4.56sPossibly by vampire. More likely auto accident or heart disease, but possibly vampire.
8.31sGrandpa Rick, couldn't you, like, use your superknowledge to turn yourself into a teenager and come to our school and help us hunt the vampire down?
1.59sUm -- Wow,
2.26sYeah, pretty specific pitch, Summer.
5.63sI probably could turn myself into a teenager and hang out in the zit-covered, hormone-addled,
1.99slow-stakes assworld that is high school.
1.63sBut here's my reverse-ask --
2.76sWhy in the fuck would I ever do that, ever?
2.16sAnd how dare you even ask me that?
1.83sAnd why aren't you more ashamed of yourself?
0.03sDad!
2.09sBe ashamed of yourself, sweetie.
1.8sJerry! Do you know what you just said to our daughter?
1.97sSor-ry! I wasn't paying attention.
2.4sTo a conversation about vampires?!
2.59sClearly, I didn't know it was about vampires,
1.76sbecause I wasn't paying attention,
1.47swhich you would know,
1.76sif you ever paid attention to me!
1.9sOh, here we go, right to the victim role,