1.75sJoe, did you get any Christmas presents?
1.33sNo! QUAGMIRE: Me, neither!
2.47sI got eight mediocre things.
1.89sGood morning, Quahog. Our top story today,
2.12sSanta Claus skips Christmas.
6.61sHopeful citizens worldwide woke up to disappointment this morning when they discovered no gifts from Santa under their Christmas trees.
3.64sLocal officials are going with the theory that everyone was bad this year.