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1.6sAutobots always win.
2.2sYou think Optimus Prime's gonna be dead, but then he's not dead.
3.44sI'm taking this from a robot that turns into a canoe?
2.9sWhen there's a battle on a gently-moving river, you'll want me.
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3.04sNow, as I said before, I can't make you into studs.
2.67sI can only help you bring out your "inner stud."
1.77sBut there's a lot of potential here.
0.64s
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2.77sNow how many of you guys think a woman is looking for Prince Charming?
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2.14sWrong! They're looking for bastards like me!
5.14s(MURMURING) Mort, how many times you been laid since your wife died?
1.22sDo Muriel's clothes count?
1.38sNo!
2.67sYou wanna know how many times I've been laid since last night? 60!
3.02sWhy? 'Cause I'm not trying to be a girl's Prince Charming.
3.27sI'm trying to be that big mistake they made at the bar last night.
2.35sLook, what's the first thing you say to a woman when you meet her?
2.7s"Pleased to meet you. That's a handsome scarf pin."
1.53sNo! You say, "Hi, there!
1.64s"How's your relationship with your father?"