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4.03sThe next minute, you're in a fist fight with your alien son.
1.43sI'm an alien?
1.93sWe all have bad impulses, bad thoughts.
3.43sWe just have to learn to channel them into something constructive.
2.53sBut I want to murder everyone I see.
3.43sWell, you know, I mean, maybe there's a job out there for people that feel that way.
1.43sMAN: Actually, there is.
4.06sHi. I'm Brad Anderson, creator of the nationally syndicated comic strip "Marmaduke."
1.93sYou should consider being a creative.
5.23sI'm haunted by uncontrollable thoughts of mutilation and sexual assault on a near daily basis.
2.53sBut, you know, I channel it all into my work.
1.63s- Oh, Wow.
- Huh.
2.03sI never got that impression from reading "Marmaduke."
3.63sWell, did you get the impression I was trying to make you laugh?
1.08s
2.37sTell me that wasn't Brad Anderson.
2.09sAw, see? You hear that, Marty Jr.?
2.16sMaybe you could try being a creative of some kind.
4.27sMaybe! I always have sort of wanted to see my face on the back of a novel.
2.94sI mean, what I really want to do is slit people's throats,
1.09sbut beyond that...