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2.59sHey, Springfield. If you're driving, you may wanna sit down.
1.93sUh-oh.
3.59sBecause it's time for Bill and Marty's 5:00 news "flush."
8.22sOh, yeah Our topless story-- President Clinton has launched a new Web site.
3.25sUh-oh. Wait. Let me guess. WWW dot--
1.1sdot--
2s
3.25s"Web site."
2.85sOkay, here's another news "flush."
7.41sOh, yeah Doctors say the life expectancy of the average man is now 76.2 years.
2.05s
2.22s
4s76.2? But I'm already 38.1.
2.25sI've wasted half my life.
5.79sOh, yeah Half my life gone and I'm only guaranteed 38 more years.
2.84s
0.57s