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1.9sSo, which one of you wants to lose your virginity?
1.57sMom, this party sucks.
4sI mean, balloons? Pin the Tail on the Donkey? I'm not five years old.
3.07sMeg, your father worked very hard to put this party together.
2.23sAnd he says he's got a big surprise for you.
3.94sHey, kids, I'm Pee-Pants, the inebriated hobo clown.
4.4sI'm an adorable tramp who wears found clothing and eats out of your garbage can.
3.07sA clown? Dad, I'm 17.
2.74sMeg, guess what Pee-Pants got you for your birthday?
2.47sA scarf. I don't want a scarf, Dad.
3.27sWell, then, how about a dozen scarves?
5.87s(COUGHS) Peter, I don't think you're actually supposed to swallow those.