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2.27sAll right, Fox News auditions, take one.
2.2sFear-based, right-wing-agenda-pushing news stories.
2.13sFear-based, right-wing-agenda-pushing news stories!
2.27sFear-based, right-wing-agenda-pushing news stories!
4.77sHi, I'm Al Harrington of Al Harrington's Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm-Flailing Tubeman Warehouse and Emporium.
2.07sDue to a lack of interest in my shoddy merchandise,
2.64sa soul-crushing divorce, and a never-ending custody battle,
2.2sI am desperately trying to get into another line of work,
2.97sand I am hoping to pass the news on to you!
3.74sI... I no can read these words.
2.97sThis is the way we deliver the news on the high seas.
1.77sThirteen are dead in a subway in Paris
10.34sAnd heavy rains flooded the east side of Pittsburgh And gas prices have hit a 14-year high And Britney backed over her 7-month-old And even though this Iraqi veteran lost his hands,
2.7she didn't lose his ability to feel.
2.27sI'm Lois Griffin for Fox News.
1.34sGreat story, Lois.
1.73sThanks. I just made it up.
3.07sYou know, I've been doing this job a long time, and I think you've got what it takes.