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1.3sLet's kick him some more!
1.63sNo, wait, let me explain.
4.15sIt all began one fateful night a thousand years ago.
1.45sWhoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
1.37sYou're 1,000 years old?
1.93sYour bio says you're 27.
5.96sLies! I change my identity and upgrade my appearance every few decades to avoid suspicion.
6.96sI was all of history's great acting robots: Acting Unit 0.8, Thespomat, David Duchovny.
2.42sLook, are you the original were-car or not?
6.17sNo, but you are nearing the end of your search for, you see, I was attacked by the original were-car.
1.55sGive us a name, MacButt!
7.72sThe year was 2019 and I was just a lowly robot arm working in an automotive research lab.
8.06sI was working on Project Satan a savage, intelligent military vehicle built from the most evil parts of the most evil cars in all the world--