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3.16sI want to thank God. I want to thank the Lord God.
0.67s
2.66s'Cause it's not really up to me. It's up to him.
0.88s
2.03sAnd I want to thank the devil, too.
3.13sYou know, 'cause that's why God's there.
3.6sHe's minding the fence, making sure that guy never comes back.
0.51s
0.97sUh...
2.4sYou know, if it weren't for the devil, God'd probably go insane,
2.8sblow his brains out from boredom, you know?
0.77s
4.7sEverybody likes to feel useful. Maketh the world go round.
0.57s
1.09sBack to you, Tom.
2.13sDiane, didn't your first husband blow his brains out?
1.97sOh, God.
1.54s
3.03sComing up. America's hottest new curse word, "kleeman."
1.76sWe'll tell you what it means after this.
2.16sBoy, Lois, I can't believe this is happening to me.
1.73sI'm somebody now, you know?
2.83sI don't have to lie to people about my life anymore.
2.53sOh, I am so happy for you, Peter.
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