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5.86sNEWSCASTER: We now go live to our eye-in-the-sky hovercopter on the scene of that terrible hovercopter crash.
2.6sJim? The news is not good.
3.19sI've just learned that my final words were, "Back to you, Linda."
0.75s
3.29s(LAUGHING) One for the blooper reel.
2.54s(SIGHS) The news is so violent.
2.2sLet's watch Rachael Ray instead.
2.1sNo, wait, there might be chopping.
4.14sGod, what a wuss. Stop being such a spineless jellyfish.
3.62sYou know full well I am more closely related to the sea cucumber.
1.28sNot where it counts.
1.02s(GROANS)
0.64s
1.7sI hated Jim!
7.09sIn other news, our city's filthy, urine-soaked walls have been desecrated by a mysterious tile-work graffiti artist.
4.6sPolice have no leads as to who's behind this innovative scourge of public art.
1.8s
1.8s(CHUCKLING VICIOUSLY)
7.08s