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3.59sThree weeks from now, I'll be off the air.
3.44sWell, apparently, all men think the same way,
3.4sbecause around the same time, James dumped me.
0.51s
1.44s
2.82sI watched my career and my love life crumble,
3.02sand I wasn't gonna just stand by and take it.
4.2sThat's when I had the good fortune to meet a young news intern named Priscilla.
5.72sShe was so anxious to get into the reporting business and would have done anything to get on my good side.
1.62sSo I seized the moment.
6.29sI paid her off to seduce James Woods and reel him into a relationship like a fish on a line.
5.17sI knew a hot, young woman like Priscilla could manipulate him into doing anything I wanted.
3.52sAt my direction, she persuaded him to become a born-again Christian,
4.74sand instilled him with the drive to bring together all the people he'd wronged.
2.8sThat's how this weekend came to pass.
3.67sOf course, Priscilla knew nothing of my real intentions,