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3.3sI slept with an underage virgin to cure my puff penis.
2.5sHey, fellows. You want to join me in a game of mumble peg?
2.57sOh, no, thanks. Fine. I'll play by myself.
2.04s(MUMBLING GIBBERISH)
1.47s
1.63sOne, nothing!
2.87sMADAME CLAUDE: Eventually, after many months at sea,
4.77sGriffin Peterson and his shipmates finally reached the New World.
2.47sI declare this land Quahog!
2.44sThis place is nothing but a wilderness! What are we gonna do?
2.27sWe're gonna build a new settlement.
3.57sWe'll have a happy new life, and we'll have equal rights for all.
4.07sExcept blacks, Asians, Hispanics, Jews, gays, women, Muslims...
2.07sUm... Everybody who's not a white man.
2.7sAnd I mean white-white. So no Italians, no Polish.
2.54sJust people from Ireland, England and Scotland.
2.17sBut only certain parts of Scotland and Ireland.
1.87sJust full-blooded whites.
1.7sNo, you know what? Not even whites.
1.8sNobody gets any rights.
1.6s(SIGHS) America.
Index