Use the timeline below to select up to 20 seconds to watch or share.
0.67s
1.2sGood night, buddy.
1.2sHey, what's the matter?
2.1sI'm scared of the storm, Dad.
2.5sWhy, you know, I think the storm is moving away from us, Chris.
1.03sYou know how I can tell?
1.57sHere's a little trick.
5.34sWhen you see the lightning, you count all the terrible things that can happen to a child, until you hear the thunder.
1.64sAnd if you count higher each time,
1.63syou know the storm is moving away from you.
1.5s- Okay, ready?
- Ready.
1.17s
1.43sOkay. Drowning.
1.8sGetting shot in a drive-by.
1.93sLyme disease from a deer tick.
1.9sGood, good. Getting stabbed in the face.
1.13sGetting shot in the face.
1.53sShot in the face. There you go.
2.74sI see you're kind of stealing mine, but it's okay. Leukemia.
2.4sHaving a mosquito bite you on your scab.
1.8s(THUNDER RUMBLING) Oh! There's your thunder.
2.04sOkay, let's try again.
2.77sOkay. Swallowing a razor blade accidentally.
3.87s(THUNDER RUMBLING) Oh, crap! It's getting closer.
1.53sOkay, okay, try to think of a happy place to be.
1.27sHappy place. Uh...
2.8sOkay, okay, I'm on MTV's Jackass.
1.43sHey, I'm Stewie Griffin,
3.07sand I'm going to be kicking my dad's ass all day today.