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1.43sI wouldn't know.
3.55sThe point is, do you even know any actual folk songs?
2.7sPfft! Actual folk songs are all public domain.
2.69sWhere's the money in that? I'll just make up my own.
4.39sBut, robot, you can't just make up folk songs like you can a medical diploma.
1.75sThey have to come from the heart.
1.77sWrong again, Zoidberg.
4.54sWhile you were yakking, I downloaded every folk song in the universe and analyzed them.
2.89sThere are only a few basic patterns.
5.7sFor example, 36% of all folk-song heroes work on a railroad and are named "Big" something.
1.3sNext slide, please.
0.82s
0.6s
7.83s75% of these big railroad men have bad-hearted women who done them wrong, usually with a smooth-talking rambler.
1.67sThere's a lot more, but in the end,
1.83ssomebody kills somebody... Blah, blah, blah.
5.31sSomebody kills somebody Blah, blah, blah Catchy!
1.87sNot what I meant, but don't perform it without my permission!
1.03sAnyway,
4.15susing this simple formula, I can generate as many hit folk songs as I want.