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5.87sAdd the number of people at the Last Supper minus the number of Filipinos in the Bible,
3.32sand you get... Three million, 100...
3.3s3:15 p.m., May 18th.
1.82sThat's when the Rapture will begin.
2.37sMay 18th? That's one week from today!
2.07s(GASPS) A week? That's...
1.1s
1.57sSeven days from now!
3s(RINGING BELL) The world will end next week!
4.34sSpend your children's college funds! Thaw that turkey now!
3.22sThis is Kent Brockman reporting live from downtown Springfield,
5.02swhere overweight doomsayer Homer Simpson is predicting the world will end next Wednesday.
3.55sHomer, what turned you from sad drunk to mad monk?