1.57sMy life is awesome.
3.24sI've waited 15 years for this moment, Briggs.
4.77sDo you have any idea what it's like to have to lift yourself into a wheelchair every morning?
2.5sTo have your wife look at you like you're half a man?
1.7sTo get preferential parking?
3.8sTo board a plane early with the first-class people and gold card members?
1.7sAll right, it's not all bad.
1.77sBut I'm not going to kill you.