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1.77sAll the things that make us
1.52sLaugh and cry
4.39sHe's a family guy
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4sGood evening. I'm Tom Tucker bringing you news you heard four hours ago on the Internet.
2.63sOur top story, a mishap in Quahog Harbor today.
1.87sThat's right, Tom.
5.67sA ferry carrying a shipment of brand-new Mercedes-Benzes from Germany crashed and sank just a few miles off our coast.
4.9sThus far, the cars remain on the ocean floor as the Germans refuse to clean up the disaster.
4.04sThe German Environmental Minister called a press conference to issue the following statement.
2.87sI see nothing! I know nothing!
1.8sHoly crap! Did you hear that, Lois?