Use the timeline below to select up to 20 seconds to watch or share.
1.84sBart, if I wanted to kill you...
0.62sI'd have choked you as soon as I walked in.
2.7sBut what kind of guest would I have been?
1.33sNow, where was I?
2.67sAh, yes-- my lowest ebb.
1.69sYou can't take my Emmy.
4.6sYou know the rules: awards for entertainment are contraband.
4.37sNo Emmys, no Oscars, not even a Golden Globe.
2.94sBut kismet be kind, well as cruel.
2.1sI received an answer to my letter...
2.27sfrom the prison pen pal program.
2.07s"I need a man and cannot find one...
1.38s"among the law abiding.
5.49s"I have a steady job and a lucrative hobby: "filing nuisance lawsuits.
1.82s"I share an apartment with my twin sister.