Create a Clip

Use the timeline below to select up to 20 seconds to watch or share.

2.1sSeaman Simpson, your actions have given the Navy...
2.14sa black eye from which it may never recover.
4.02sI would throw the book at you, but I've been indicted in the Tailhook scandal.
2.21sGood-bye.
0.93sI, too, would punish you,
3.77sbut I'm under indictment for accepting bribes from military contractors.
1.47s
2.7sUm, I torpedoed a Carnival Cruise ship.
2.52sImpersonating the first lady.
2.04s
0.72sI think you're off the hook.
2.77sWhoo-hoo!
0.53s
1.1s
1.2s
4.7sA dishonorable discharge. That's the best we could have hoped for.
3.54sYou can't spell "dishonorable" without "honorable."
2.3sI think you're a hero, Dad.
2.03sWell, I couldn't have done it without Bart.
3.87sBoy, I guess I was wrong about that earring. It saved us all.
2.54sThen can I get a tattoo that says, "Bite me"?
2.17sYou never know when it might come in handy.
1.93s- I don't think so, Son. - A king cobra?
1.38sNo. Weapons-grade plutonium?
1.63sAsk your mother. Knockout drops?
1.47sNo. Ninja death stars?
1.22sMaybe for Christmas.
Index