2.99sHey, you're just in time. Mort's one ball away from a perfect game.
2.16sOh, God. The pressure's too much.
2.09sI just lost control of my bladder.
1.08s
3.77sWhy didn't I clothespin the end of my penis like Muriel told me to?
1.96s
4.25s
2.4sJeez, relax, Mort. You'd think you were God himself.
1.49sNo, he's over there.
3.27sHey, you want to see what I can do? All right, ready? Check it out.
2.16sBeer, glass. All right, now watch this.
2.37sOh, hey. Guess I'll go over here for a minute.
0.74s
1.09sOh, holy crap!
2.13sThat's still pouring itself. Oh, wow. That's amazing.
2.43sI've never seen anyone do that. You want to go out later?
1.93sI'll be right back. I'm gonna go tinkle.