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3.4sDriver's license, Social Security card, American Express.
1.47sWhat the hell is he doing?
1.97sWow, I guess you are James Woods.
3.14sSo, now, let me understand this, what are you here to promote, James?
3.97sWell, Dave, I have a hilarious new movie coming out on HBO next month.
1.3sIt's all about 9/11.
3.34sThe movie's called September 11, 2000-Fun.
4.24s(ALL GASPING) No! No, no, no, no!
2.87sJames, that sounds unbelievably offensive to Americans.
2.17sWell, you haven't heard what the movie is about.
5.17sI play a window washer who has just finished washing the last window of the World Trade Center.
2.2sAnd then I turn around to get off the scaffold,
2.63sand what do you think I see coming? A plane.
2.3sAnd I go, "Come on!"
2.1sYou know, it's real, real old-style comedy.
2.77sYou know, it's like two pies in the face,
1.67sand one in a field in Pennsylvania.
1.9sJames, I don't want to hear any more about this.
1.03sAnd the voice of the plane is David Spade.
1.45s
3.37sWhat? I would never work with David Spade!
2.93sThat dwarf! That skinny chicken shit!