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2.22sYou put that sticker on your car so you won't get any tickets.
2.17sAnd this other one keeps paramedics from stealing your wallet...
2.9swhile they're working on you. And don't bother calling 911 anymore.
1.65sHere's the real number.
1.9sOh.
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0.84s
3.65sI still don't believe all the founding fathers were Stonecutters.
2.94sThat's because you trust your stupid schoolbooks.
3.74sHere's what really happened at the signing of the Declaration of Independence.
3.05s
2.85sAnd a nation is born.
3.79sNow let us party like 'twere 1799.
2.45s
3.32sQuaff! Quaff! Quaff!
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2.95sPlease, sir, You're destroying my establishment.
5.76sWe just created the greatest democracy on Earth, you lowlife commoner.
3.59sYou wanna see how Davy Crockett really died at the Alamo? You must be 18.